let us all reveal ourselves.
under the currents of living we remain shielded.
we build walls. we cover. protect. move out of harms way. we close ourselves off, so much so that we never truly answer ‘how are you?’ honestly….. ever.
it saddens me to think in a lifetime that so many may rush past living, miss out on connecting, miss out on experiencing life from inside themselves.
understandably life can be tough, challenging, even excruciating for some. it can be scary to feel everything. we are all served up a different experience, a unique experience is each lifetime.
i feel the purpose that i can offer, is to serve, to write, to share my perspective and heart, even if it goes unnoticed. my purpose is living my unique experience and sharing it honestly with those around me. when i share my lessons, struggles, triumphs, when i share my heart, it offers up to me an opportunity to experience life more fully from the inside. when i speak what i hide behind, when i share what unnerves me…. what i inquire about, what moves me, it lets people see me for who i am.
when i do share myself, i feel naked, unclothed, exposed…..usually for a moment or two, then something spins, swirls and there is this unspeakable ease that arrives in my body. everything softens. my exhale becomes its own release, as if separating from my body, mind and entire being, and life no longer becomes about suffering or struggle, it simply IS and i simply AM.
how do i cultivate this sharing on this platform…..reveal myself…….and give space for you to do the same
when i am nervous sometimes i scratch my nose. i rub my eyes as if an eyelash suddenly has fallen into my eye. i cough to avoid crying and try desperately not to let anyone see me cry. I also try to make myself small in hopes to remain unseen. i lean, hanging onto something to keep myself grounded; vulnerability sometimes makes me flighty.
something as simple as revealing your nervous habits……reveals really how much effort you have invested in not wanting to be seen. it is so important to ask yourself how much time you sacrifice living in this small space, when you could share your vulnerability with others and allow them to really see you.
i recall a conversation i had with a dear friend, we were chatting about knowing our own value. i can recall sharing with her that something inside of me told me that i possessed this radiance and that i was terrified for people to recognize me for that…..to call me out and in some way identify me as this radiant human being. she shared bits about how we must trust that we are these incredible beings, that are meant to feel everything, and that sometimes life happens in order to pull us away from feeling it all so deeply. i look back now and giggle a bit, how could her or i, in any way think my own radiance was a ‘bad’ thing? or that our being human removed us from feeling life? how simple to think of two people inquiring about their own value, their own worth in this giant universe, reflecting back to one another each others humanness.
in no way shape or form do i own any understanding about truth, vulnerability or honesty, except from my own eyes and heart. i share my own experience of living and being. i share what is most valuable to me, what has made a difference on my path, my journey in this lifetime. i ask questions and if the answer comes too quickly, i inquire deeper and if it brings resistance or chatter inside, i stop in my tracks and turn my exploration in this direction. cultivating courage to live, to really LIVE is an arduous task, day in and day out. what keeps me afloat is the quick moment of release, that softening, that exhale. what keeps me humble is gratitude; a thread that winds its way through all of my life fully saturating every moment.
enjoy THIS day
enjoy every moment when you get to be yourself